This is Indian people the most miserable stereotype. But they really do believe in it.
Even when I was having Instagram account of a model, I did not receive harassment messages. Neither do I receive it on my photography account. But once I have written on my personal account that I am a “Foreigner in India” – because I have started this blog, I started to receive many of such messages. And it is when I do not even post anything sexy, no nudity or lingerie pictures, no even pictures in shorts or short skirts (and it is not like Indian girls do not post such types of pictures – which I have nothing against of at all, by the way, but for them it’s considered “bold” while foreigners are considered “easy” – no matter what)! Indian people like to blame girls for guys harassing or raping them, saying they were “asking for it” by wearing anything short, suppose, or whatever else. Same here, I suppose, saying that you are a foreigner in India, means I am “asking for it”? I won’t be surprised if it is a real thinking of the guys who do send such kind of messages, unfortunately…No, I am totally aware that they do send it to Indian girls a lot too. But the problem that stereotype doesn’t go away because of it….
Funny thing is, for those who did not read about me (you can read it Here), I am 27 years old, married (to Indian) woman and I do receive such kind of messages from even teenagers! Messages like “I want to f*ck you”.
Apart from heavy staring, India does have big problems with harassment and rape. Indian women now hate men, ask for death penalty for rape. They feel scared to be raped for their whole lives. Many Indians parents are scared to allow their daughters to go to parties equally as to their sons. About woman safety issue in India I will write more later.
But here we are, foreign women, who came to visit India because we believed in the country’s spirituality. India, unfortunately has disappointed me in it a lot. And here we are, women who were seen as decent in their countries, who weren’t scared every second being out of home before, who have found their LOVE in such country like India, and now seen and treated as EASY and SLUTS. JUST BECAUSE WE ARE NOT INDIAN! JUST BECAUSE INDIAN PEOPLE HAVE SUCH STEREOTYPES ABOUT US (and from where do they get these ideas even????) For no fault of ours…(I can say that not all Indian people think such way but mostly those who know foreigners personally realize that it depends on the person, not a nation!) The problem is that Indian people take this stereotype very casually, like a normal thing, as if we are, foreign girls, also supposed to have this kind of perception about ourselves! We are being asked rude questions about it or excusing that we are not like that just because somebody has such mindset for some reason. If Indian man is married to a Russian woman, there is many chances that some relative, friend or neighbor will ask him or his family straight in their faces: “But Russian girls are prostitutes?” (or can use the word “sl*ts” which Indians don’t even differentiate from “prostitutes” often). And no, such kind of person may not even feel it was extremely rude, may just consider it was “curiosity”.
And what reasons do Indian people even have to think so? No real reasons that can explain applying it on ALL of us!…It is partly due to the fact that American movies sometimes show girls jumping into bed with the guys almost immediately. Partly due to the fact that white prostitutes are more valued in Asia, because of the Asian beauty stereotypes about white skin. People in Asia don’t even think about that Asian prostitutes are considered exotic in Europe and Russia as well, the same way, but we don’t apply stereotypes for whole nations because of them!.. Indians believe that such comedies like “American Pie” where they show a lot of s*x are showing a real life…It is just a black humor, people! Although Indians themselves make even more unrealistic movies often – we do not think that Indians always sing and dance in groups in daily life, and also fly during fights, right? Some Indian people also tell that it is because they see white actresses in foreign porn, they believe so..Some people even tell that Indian men stare at foreigners BECAUSE OF THIS! What can I say about this?
The worst in this is not the teenagers behavior – they are teenagers after all – hormones jump and no wisdom. The worst in this is that elderly people believe in it. The worst that they are the ones who tell these ideas to their desperate teenagers. They, of course, believe they are trying to do better, that they “take care” of their sons, saying:”Be careful of foreigners, they are easy”. Their fathers just forget themselves when they were young, they forget that boys think not with brains in those times….And their “Be careful…” actually sounds for them like: “With the foreigner you have got much more chances, they won’t say “no” to you, they sleep with everybody because they are easy”. This applies even more for Russian girls…The guys parents can add separately that “Russian girls are prostitutes”.
And what if I do write on my Instagram that “I am Russian in India”? I personally hate the stereotype that Russians are sl*ts but the point that in another countries, at least, people do not apply it on ALL Russian women. This is RACISM just. Some Russian girls of course are, but far not only Russian, there are easy and decent girls in every country! But why are all Russian women responsible for those girls? There is not only Russian prostitutes in the world, please stop it! I just wonder how there is SO MANY prostitute experts, especially in India?
But how you feel when you always were a nerdy shy girl who hardly had relationships in her life? How you feel when you know there are the girls in Russia who want to remain virgins before marriage even if it can leave them forever alone? How you feel when you know that Indian girls have relationships too, just mostly hide it? How you feel when you know that Russian guys don’t send harassment messages to Russian girls almost and Indian guys are famous for this in the world? How you feel when you know touching in public places and rape doesn’t almost happen in Russia, despite of shorts and short skirts being common clothes? That in Russia you are not afraid to be raped in train even if you are teenager girl travelling alone? And in India you are afraid even being an adult woman. And no, Russia doesn’t have death penalty for rape. Russia doesn’t have death penalty at all, actually. How you feel when you know that in Russia women who are chasing money in men are called “b*tches” or “sl*ts” while you know that in India money is the first question for marriage for a girl (or/and for her parents) – but no, we don’t think anything bad about Indian girls in Russia. NOTHING just!…Russian people also do have some stereotypes about India but they at least do not have dangerous consequences (and I am going to brake them too, don’t worry, I am not just trying to be patriotic here).
(P.S.: I know, quite many Russian girls who went abroad in the past, did it for marrying rich men, but happened to do escort and prostitution (though many who went in 90-s were also forced into s*x slavery). But because of this, there is also still strong belief in Russia, that women who go to work abroad, can get into s*x slavery and become prostitutes, also because of them. So it is not one-sided thing. We have stereotype about “abroad” in Russia too, and Asia is considered to be more dangerous about it more, somehow).
And even though people usually believe that girls who marry abroad – do marry rich guys, my husband is not rich. Indian perception of marriage is much more logical than ours – we put LOVE as most important thing for marriage. I was not the girl who wanted to move abroad ever, and despite of the fact that Indian people mostly believe foreigners move here because they love India, even if India is not a bad country, how we supposed to love this part here?
I just wonder, Indian people, do you think that foreign girls parents do not tell them not to hurry with s*x, to be careful (or even to be careful with Asian guys in such matter)? Do you think that only Indian parents care for their daughters? The difference is just that Christian people don’t have arranged marriages – it just doesn’t happen – so we have to date in the order to get married – otherwise we will not get married just ever, our parents will not be able to find somebody for us after certain age! And we have to choose a life partner ourselves, our parents don’t consider they have a right to do it for us (mostly) – not because they do not care but because they consider that we can not be happy with the person we do not love. That love can overcome the difficulties, nothing else. And parents don’t consider marriages to happen for them but for us. This is how things work, we have really different psychological mindsets about marriages with most of Indians. Arranged marriages in Russia do not happen for 100 years (except for some Muslims and some Armenians). Does this make us sl*ts?
And the problem is bigger than just people opinions, unfortunately. The stereotype makes those guys to send harassment messages to foreigners more, this stereotype makes our lives more unsafe in India. Foreign women are being asked about if their husbands are just for fun in public places in India, tourists report about being mast*rbated at in public places and there were cases of foreigners being raped. This is something you expect to happen in “spiritual” country during travelling? Yes, I started to believe that stereotype about Indian spirituality is equally wrong to the Indian stereotype about foreigners being sl*ts – it’s all about just a few people. Indian guys – you d*ck is not a famous sight of India everybody wants to see. I know, Indian girls face all of it too, but Indian parents, your “Be careful, foreigner girls are sl*ts” and beauty stereotypes about white skin (which we don’t have by the way – I will also write about this opposite mindsets later) can put us even in bigger danger than Indian girls.
Indian guys also create accounts on VK (famous in Russia social media) and even send messages in Russian language. Indian guys do ask rude questions about foreigners and Russian girls on Quora. But what happens to them when, by their opinions, even “easy sl*ts” ignore them and say abusive “no”, after they have heard it from hundreds of Indian girls already? Their self-esteem becomes extremely law. They get desperate because women are not available for them at all maybe? “Forbidden fruit is always the sweetest”. Maybe it would be better to take them to real prostitutes after all? Everybody wins like this.
Please share this post, help me to spread awareness as much as possible. Please tell elder people in your family to stop telling such kind of things to their sons (unless they wish something bad to us).
P.S.: I am not writing it to show some aggression to Indian people but to raise awareness that this kind of thinking has consequences for the people who are not at fault of it at all.
To read about the stereotype “Foreigners are not like us” please Click Here.
To read about the stereotype “Foreigners do know know anything about our culture” please Click Here.
To read about the stereotype “Foreigners are rich” please Click Here.
To read about the stereotype “Foreigner girls do not know how to cook” please Click Here.